mazeofrelationships | Human AU where no one died and did sins but there's still Hurt

Human AU where no one died and did sins but there's still Hurt

It's not easy being a gay man in the early 1940s, and Anthony Caruso knew he'd have to keep his sexuality discreet even after he and his twin sister left their mob family and never looked back. But Anthony is a romantic at heart, always dreaming of a One True Love like in the fairy tales. Meeting that one person who stole his heart and gave theirs back and even if they could never get married or do all the things straight people did, they'd be each other's.

Maybe he got a bit too caught up in the fantasy, because Clive was all that and more. They fell in love at first sight, spent many passionate nights together, talked about a future together. At one point they talked about running away together.

Then Clive told him it was over. I'm getting married, Anthony. She's the daughter of my parents' closest friends and they've always hinted that we should be together. Her name's Antoina. The fact that her name's so close to his stings the most. Clive wanted him, but the only way he'd ever stay forever is if Anthony was a woman. And now he's got that.

Clive was bisexual, but Anthony figured it didn't matter because Clive loved him. Except he never did, not enough to risk displeasing his parents to run away with him. I can pass as normal, Anthony, and that's...just what I need to do. I'm sorry, I love you.

That night Anthony took off the necklace Clive had given him and flung it off a bridge. He couldn't even go to Molly with this; she knew her twin was gay but she was busy with her family and of course his brother-in-law, nephews, and niece didn't know the truth. Molly passed him off as "too spirited to settle down" and Anthony was fine with that.

As it is, he'll never find anyone to settle with. He won't marry some girl just to pass as straight, it's not fair to either of them.

So lately he's been going to a local bar to sip a glass of brandy and mope.

At least the bartender's a good guy who doesn't mind some pathetic kid being sad in front of his customers.

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Howard Jackson is known as someone who doesn't give a shit who you are as long as you pay your bar tab and aren't an asshole. The Magic Cat is a safe place for everyone of any color and any sexuality. The minute someone says something bigoted, they're banned, no questions asked.

He's known to be a former magician, a divorced single father with a teenage daughter who helps around the bar. Missy is almost always there, sassing customers, and telling couples who don't ever get to hear it that they're absolutely adorable.

Howard has noticed Anthony before, but this latest crash is almost worrying. The next time he comes in, his brandy's at his usual stool pretty much as soon as he gets there. "Alright, Anthony. What's going on? You look like hell."

Even though he's been coming here for a few weeks, Anthony hasn't felt ready to talk about Clive. He knows how accepting Magic Cat is, but the wounds are still fresh even after he finally told Molly and she let him cry on her shoulder. I'll always have time for my twin even with a husband and kids. Besides, Max took the kids to the movies and they'll probably go for sodas afterwards. We've got time.

But they say holding things in makes them hurt worse, and Anthony's otherwise been pretty tight-lipped.

"I got dumped a few weeks ago," he says. "Been seeing this guy for over a year, says he loves me, we were gonna really make a go of it. Then he goes off and gets married." It made the papers and Antonia even looks like a female Anthony.

"Oh, shit." Howard winces, already pouring him another drink. "Yeah, that would take it out of anyone. Sounds like it was out of nowhere, too. What reason did he give?"

He doesn't read the papers much, mostly it's depressing, and he really doesn't give a shit who's marrying who. Missy sometimes shows him an article or two from people who leave it sitting around, but most of the time, he doesn't care.

"Said it was better for everyone if he passed as straight. I knew he liked guys and girls both but he told me I was special. Said I was enough to make him forget girls entirely, even other guys." Anthony drains the first glass and accepts the second. "He seemed sad about it, but was he really? I just...can't help wondering if I was just one last fling before he settled down. Or some way to get back at his parents before he decided to just bow to their wishes cause it was easier."

"Asshole. Point him out if he ever comes in here. I'll ban him." Howard shakes his head. "My sympathies. You deserve better. He sounds like a lot of hot air." A pause. "But clearly you loved him."

A pause. "What do you like to do, Anthony? For that matter, what's your job?"

"I did. After my sister he was the one person I thought I could trust and really open up to," Anthony sighs. "Maybe he just got scared, or his parents got suspicious and threatened him."

Really, Clive wasn't a bad guy. It's just the world they live in, especially now that even the movies they went to for escapism want to warn all queer people that being queer's a sin punishable by death or insanity.

"I'm kinda between jobs. After I left home I got into the entertainment biz, mostly stage stuff. Did some vaudeville while it was still kinda popular, danced in a few shows, sang at a few clubs."

His heart goes out to this guy. Navigating this world's bad enough, but trying to do so while different is absolute hell. Thinking for a moment, he leans across the bar.

"Well, we happen to be between singers at the moment. Why don't you come sing here." A shrug. "If you want to. No one'll care what you choose to sing, and no one'll bother you."

Howard might be starting to want to get to know this guy better without realizing it.

"Really? You'd hire a sad sack like me?" Anthony almost smiles. "I could use the work. I've still got money left from the shows I did, but money don't last forever. And I'd rather stick my hand in a box of thumbtacks than go to my parents for money." Or his brother. Or even his schoolteacher aunt who loves but still thinks he's "going through a phase".

"That bad, huh?" Howard does smile. "How about this. Piano player's back in about an hour. Go talk to him when he gets back and sing me something. People like it, you're in. If your landlord's an asshole, I got some rooms upstairs going spare, you could set up in one if you want."

"Thanks." Anthony manages a small smile right back, taking out his wallet to pay for his drinks. "I might take you up on that room offer, too." His landlord's okay, but the apartment's where he spent so much time with Clive. Too many painful memories. Plus the pipes suck, the shower's cold half the time.

"This one's on me." Husk pushes his money away. "I thought you might appreciate a room that isn't full of memories. First thing I did when my wife left me was get out of that damn house."

"Really? Thanks." Angel blinks. "So that's what happened. I know you've got a kid and there's no mom in the picture, but..."

"Yeah. She constantly called me a useless ass." Howard shrugs. "The courts tried to give her custody of Missy thanks to her fuckin' attorney, and, well, me, but Missy kept running away and refusing to live with her."

"I hate her already," Anthony mutters. At least Clive had tried to be nice when he ripped his heart out and smashed it onto the pavement, "So how'd you end up with custody? Her attorney get caught with his pants down or takin' a bribe or somethin'?"

"I think they just got tired of trying to take Missy back to her, and her mom gave up." Howard shrugs.

Before he can say anything, the stool beside Anthony is taken by a smirky teen. "Yup! I really didn't want to stay with Mom especially considering how shitty she treats Dad. So I just kept leaving."

"Good call, kid." Anthony smirks. "Hi, I'm Anthony. I've the sad sack who comes in here drinking Campari and sighing every time someone sings Isn't It Romantic." That was his and Clive's favorite song.

"Good to meetcha! I'm Missy, Dad's biggest pain in the ass."

Howard rolls his eyes. "She's not wrong. Anthony's going to sing for us, Missy, so you'll probably be seein' more of him around."

Missy grins a bit. "Good. It's been too quiet around here. It gets boring when it's just drunks shoutin' and Dad throwing them out."

"Yeah, I hear some people gettin' a bit too sauced now and then. Fighting, drama, I guess even a place like this is gonna have that kinda thing." It's not as bad as the shit that went down at home. The stereotype of rambunctious Italians is unfortunately very true in Anthony's very big extended family.

"I do what I can, but when people are around booze, they get stupid." Husk shrugs, and Missy waves, bouncing off to clear some tables.

"She's a handful, but she's the brightest light in my life." His voice is fond, smiling after his daughter.

"She's a good kid. I like her already, I'm glad you managed to get her away from her mom," Anthony says. "So you're acting like I've already got the gig singing for you and you haven't even heard me yet."

"I'm a good judge of character. There's something about you that I like." He shrugs. "You also don't seem like the kind of guy who would say they're in the biz and not be able to carry a tune in a bucket."

"Well, I don't like to brag, but even the worst shows I was in? People said my singin' was the only good part." Anthony smirks. His manager was a good guy but some of the scriptwriters he worked with were lazy or had no talent and the venues clearly felt sorry for them.

Howard grins. "That sounds like I got lucky, then." He glances over at the little stage. "Looks like the piano player's back, go talk to him, and show me what you got."

His smile widens, just watching this kid. Missy looks on and stifles a giggle. Oh, that's a good look on her dad's face.

Anthony gets up, smooths his hair, and straightens his jacket before going to talk to the piano player. Well, if Howard thinks you're something special he's gotta have a reason. Lemme hear what you've got.

Moments later, Anthony can be heard singing a soft but still upbeat rendition of Night and Day.

Howard watches, a smile on his face. The entire bar freezes, just listening to him sing.

When he's done, there's very sincere applause from everyone, as well as some cheers and requests for more.

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Human AU where no one died and did sins but there's still Hurt

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