Red Paladin AU

[tookashirototheknee]

A post for an AU of Matt as the Red Paladin!

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[yousayvoltron]

[Keith nods, his shoulders giving a slight hitch as he leans against Matt.]

Thanks.

[tookashirototheknee]

[Wordlessly, Matt leads Keith out of the room and down the hall to their bedroom. Once there, he sits on the bed and pulls Keith into his lap.]

Ok. First, and in some ways most important, I'm not leaving you. Hell, I won't ever leave you if you don't want me to.

Second, it's just us, you can let it all out now. I'm here.

[yousayvoltron]

[Keith nods, burying his face in Matt's shoulder as he lets his tears fall. He hadn't gone in there intending to open up such a wound, but he did, and it hurts like hell. He had no mother, Dad had always said she just "left" and would never talk about her. Sometimes Keith wondered if she really was dead and he just didn't know how to explain it...but no, Dad was a smart guy, he knew kids had to learn about death. No, Mom just left and Dad never said why.]

[tookashirototheknee]

[Matt just runs his hands through Keith's hair, murmuring a gentle song. He's not going to move until Keith is at least somewhat better.

When Keith's tears have let up a little, he kisses the top of his head.]

Let's get your armor off, ok? We'll get you into more comfy clothes.

[yousayvoltron]

[Keith nods, sniffling as he slowly pulls himself off of Matt's lap.]

I'd always been used to not having a mom, knowing she left, but...everything just kinda hit me at once. Being Galra, Mom leaving, my being the way I am. Even now I've still got some walls up. Still don't know how to be with people.

[tookashirototheknee]

I think we do pretty well together.

[Matt stands up, kneeling down in front of Keith and starting to take off the greaves and boots of his armor.]

But... I get it. For a while, I forgot what it was to be around or with humans. It was... odd.

[yousayvoltron]

You're the exception. You and Shiro.

[He's docile as he lets Matt undress him, sniffling and wiping his nose on his hand]

Maybe that's why you and I fit so well together.

[tookashirototheknee]

It's definitely part of it.

[He smiles a bit, moving up to keep taking off Keith's armor, leaving him in just the tight black undersuit.

He's trying so hard not to be too appreciative of his boyfriend in this moment. He needs comfort, not a horny dude all over him.]

[yousayvoltron]

[He's not up for it at the moment, but if you wanted to offer comfort sex, Matt, he'd probably welcome it in a bit. For now, though, he strips down to his boxers and pulls on his t-shirt and sweatpants.]

[tookashirototheknee]

[Matt puts Keith's armor in a corner, then climbs into bed next to him, slipping an arm around Keith and holding him close.]

Hey. Anything else I can get you?

[yousayvoltron]

Water? My head hurts, and my throat's kinda dry. This is why I hate crying.

[That, and it makes him feel weak and pathetic.]

[tookashirototheknee]

Absolutely. I'll be back in a few.

[He kisses Keith's cheek, then gets up, leaving for just a moment then returning with a container full of cold water which he hands to Keith.]

Here. Hopefully you'll feel better once you get some water in you.

[yousayvoltron]

[Keith gratefully accepts the glass and sips slowly, letting the water cool his throat. It does help, even with the remaining prickly feeling behind his eyes.]

Thanks.

[tookashirototheknee]

Absolutely.

[He reaches over for Keith's hand, holding it gently.]

It's what I'm here for, you know. I'm here to help, and get you out of embarrassing or painful situations.

[yousayvoltron]

[He takes another sip of water, squeezing Matt's hand.]

I've never talked about my mom leaving. I mean, even Shiro just knew she was gone and that's it.

[He shakes his head.]

I didn't think it would hurt this much to say it. To admit it out loud.

[tookashirototheknee]

Saying things makes them more real. So, to say that your mom left, it stings like hell, and it hurts.

[Matt squeezes his hand as well, leaning over and kissing Keith on the cheek.]

It's alright, Keith. I get it.

[yousayvoltron]

[Keith sets the water down and snuggles against Matt, gently gripping a handful of his tunic and pressing his cheek against his shoulder.]

She didn’t want me. That’s why she left, right? Guess I was just a bad seed from the start, huh?

[tookashirototheknee]

No, Keith, I don't think that's true. Think about it. You have her knife. A Blade of Marmora knife. If she was here, it was on some mission of some sort. It's possible that she couldn't stay, and your dad didn't know how to tell you that your mom was a fighter from another planet.

[Matt holds him tight for a moment.]

If she didn't care, and didn't want you, I really don't think she'd leave something as important as her Marmora knife.

[yousayvoltron]

You...think that’s it? I never really thought about it, honestly, Dad just told me the knife was hers and he gave it to me.

[He looks up a little, his eyes still puffy and his cheeks still tear-stained.]

Then maybe she really did die, if she was a Blade. It’s dangerous, I watched Ulaz sacrifice himself and Thace almost die to cover my escape.

[tookashirototheknee]

It's possible she did. It is dangerous out there, especially with Kolivan going Knowledge or Death every five minutes.

[Sorry. Matt's not too fond of Blade Dad.]

There's still a tiny chance that she's out there, though. I don't want to get your hopes up, but the possibility is there.

[yousayvoltron]

Maybe. I don’t know...if she is, and if I ever find her, I’m not sure how that’s gonna feel. I didn’t miss her, since I never knew her, I just wondered why she left me.

[He sighs, loosening his grip on Matt’s tunic and closing his eyes]

Boy, that Freud guy would have a field day with me. I literally blamed my mother for why I’m such a fuckup.

[tookashirototheknee]

[Gently, he runs a hand through Keith's hair, arm pulling him close.]

If you ever find her, I'll be there to help, you know. Even if I'm not right there in that moment. You'll always be able to come home to me and talk.

As for Freud, fuck him. Everything was dicks and sex to him.

[yousayvoltron]

[That last comment actually gets a laugh out of Keith, albeit a quiet one. He cuddles even closer, feeling some of the weight from earlier lift from him.]

I know. Every time I’ve been about to fall apart, you’ve been there to catch me.

[tookashirototheknee]

Of course, love. No matter what, I'll catch you.

[He leans over and kisses Keith gently and lingeringly.]

I can't even tell you how much you mean to me, love. You are my guiding star and the love of my life.

[yousayvoltron]

[He kisses back softly, threading his fingers through Matt’s hair]

And you’re my safe haven, my comfort zone. You make me feel like I’m worth everything when I feel like I’m nothing.